QOTD January 13

Question of the Day

QOTD January 13

Postby DeniseM » Jan 13th, '15, 9:34 am

What is a quality you admire in your parents?

My mother is very accepting of others. She is pretty non judgmental. I never realized that until I was older. She has a very strong faith as well, and yet accepts people where they are at in their faith.

My father was a man who changed and grew right before my eyes. He was a pretty typical type A personality most of his life. He got cancer when I was a freshman in high school and he used it as an opportunity to grow as a person. He became much more interested in healing his relationships and enjoying the little things in life.

Both my parents were really good with money and never had debt. They lived within their means, although they were well off, they didn't shop to impress. They were generous with experiences but did not buy lots of things.
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby mlepitts » Jan 13th, '15, 9:40 am

This is a beautiful tribute to your parents Denise. Good scrapbook pages for the future!

I love my mother's testimony. She has a relationship with her Heavenly Father and Jesus, she knows them. It gives her a strength that I hope for myself someday (although I know the trials she went through to get there and I don't look forward to that part of it... ).

I was thinking about my dad and this very topic the other day. He is another example of being able to change too. He had such a temper when we were little. He was never violent, but he did have a temper. One day he just changed and became sooooo patient. I love that about him, he knew a temper was not a trait he wanted to be remembered for, so he just stopped.
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby AmberCA » Jan 13th, '15, 1:17 pm

Great topic, Denise. I love talking about my parents because I truly adore and admire them.

My mom is one of the most giving people I know. She would do anything for me. She is very hard working and motivated. I have never gotten anything but support from my mom. I want to be just like her when I grow up ;) .

My dad is very easy going and has nurtured in me a love of nature and traveling. He's just an all around jolly guy and so good to me.
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby bonitarose » Jan 13th, '15, 1:34 pm

This is a tough subject for me.. I didn't hv great parents.. my parents never should have been parents.. it's true. I'm an only child, and the only reason my parents married all those years ago because my mom got married before she was 18 and they HAD to get married back then.. it was the right thing to do, what was expected. So they got married and had me.

My childhood was awful. I was a latchkey kid and left alone a lot. Both my parents worked full time and honestly when they came home, sure we'd eat, but after that no time spent with me really. i spent a lot of time in my room writing in diaries and out with my friends.

Because of the sad home life, some of my friends weren't the best for me. I got into a lot of trouble and made really bad decisions. Never really felt unconditional love fr my parents at all.

They both sat me down right after I graduated high school at the age of 18 and told me they were splitting up. That they honestly only stayed together till I was grown.. and now that I was grown, they could both get on with their lives.. nice. They told me to my face I was unwanted and that I ruined both their lives.

yeah.. so I have those kind of parents.

Over the years, time has healed some things.
My mom and I have an ok relationship.. but we can push ea other's buttons and can only bear small shorts of time with one another. But I do admire that she is assertive and she sticks up for herself. And she believes in living a happy life. I agree with her on those counts.

My dad and I have had no relationship at all since 2002, after I chose to divorce my first husband. My dad sided with my ex... and completely disowned me, his only daughter. Now he's a big part of my ex's life and his new wife.. it's as if he washed his hands of me, and pretty much adopted my ex. Whatever. He never wanted to hear my side of the story.. about why I chose to leave, or how I was being verbally and mentally abused.. he thought I was married to the greatest guy in the universe. He never wanted to hear my side.. although I tried to tell him. His mind was already made up. Over the years I have tried to reach out.. but it only ends with a letter filled with hate and condemnation.. last time I wrote to him, he took my letter and showed it to my ex and his wife... great.. how do i know this?? Because my daughters were there and they told me. Great.
So i have chosen to hv boundaries in my life when it comes to my dad. He is completely out of my life and that's OK with me. All he does is bring me pain. I can't imagine disowning your child, especially your only child. But he did that with me. So is there anything I admire in my father? Nothing. I guess I'm thankful he still blesses my daughters. He's in their lives, just not in mine.

We all don't have lovely loving families.
the word FAMILY to me doesn't mean what it means to most people.
For me that word means dysfunction, hurt, sadness and pain.

I've learned to live my life happy though over the years.. thanks to the help of the Lord, my hubby Greg and good people in my life and countless hours of therapy. There is always light to light the way.
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby SuzMannecke » Jan 13th, '15, 2:05 pm

Such a good question as my parents have been on my mind so much lately with their issues as the age. I hope I can find time to come back and weigh in later because I know my reply won't be a one liner. LOL
It has been really interesting to read each person's story here. Thanks for sharing everyone.
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby deblew » Jan 13th, '15, 2:20 pm

My mom is one of the most loving, accepting people I know. With ten kids, and tons of grand, and great-grand kids, she always has enough love to go around, plus some! She never has an unkind word to say about anyone, and is always postive and uplifting. I always want to aspire to be more like her... but fail miserably.

As for my dad... he was a hard worker. We was not the most loving father, I really don't think he should have had kids, much less ten of them, but he did the best he could, and I miss him a lot.
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby DeniseM » Jan 13th, '15, 2:54 pm

Bonita I am so sorry to hear about your story. It sounds like you ah e had a good life that you have made for yourself and that's what matters.

Growing up in an alcoholic home was no picnic for sure but I think despite their problems my parents were good people that did the best they could. I feel very fortunate despite the difficulties. That has come over time though.

Love reading your answers everyone!
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby Funky Fairy » Jan 13th, '15, 4:33 pm

Wow, there are certainly are some stories here.

Bonita, your's could be a movie. I'm so happy that you found happiness in your second marriage.
There is alot to be said for a second marriage when you've had so much hurt previously. You appreciate your partner so much.

My Mum is a good teacher and loves to feed.
If you were to visit and say that you would like to learn to knit and by the way you are hungry, she would love you to bits. She's very patient when showing you something. As kids it was always Mum that helped us with school work and anything else. Dad had a very short fuse. I remember learning to tell the time and being screamed at and being made to stand facing the wall in disgrace.
We all laugh about it now. Dad is the most fantastic grandparent and one of my best friends now. But he was a very harsh Dad.

So Dad, I love his sense of humour. I inherited it. There's few people that I can totally be myself 100% and say what stupid things come to mind and they laugh with me. I guess it's because I got it from him. He's so funny and such a people's person. He's an English guy, living in Southern Indiana for the past 20yrs and works as a Ford cars salesman in Kentucky and he does so well. He's always top salesman as everyone loves him. His 100% honest and makes everyone laugh. He's one of my favourite people to be around and it sucks that I/we only see him once a year. But we do spend ages on skype and the phone every week.
I'm so lucky to have him.
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby Funky Fairy » Jan 13th, '15, 4:33 pm

Ps..... I'm still a Daddy's girl, can you tell? :D
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Re: QOTD January 13

Postby KimberlyMarie » Jan 13th, '15, 6:55 pm

My Mother's kind nature and her patience. I was actually thinking of making layout about this very thing this afternoon :)
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